Bridging Fantasy & Reality

There was a quote I stumbled upon recently. I can't recall if it was from a book or if it was from a movie that I watched. But the fact that I remember it to this day means it struck some sort of chord with me. Life is about living the breadth of it, not merely the length of it.

I'd like to think that I've been really living it up both ways. But fact is, I know that there is more breadth to life. Or my life at least. Look how long it took me to reconnect with my love for pouring out my feelings in words. Long enough for blog parasites to invade my chat box, that's how long

I've been itching to cook up a storm in the kitchen for the longest time. Be it a simple dish of tom yam soup or a more complicated concoction of stuffed ravioli. I remember how life in Auckland granted me permission when it came to making a complete mess out of the kitchen and in the process a masterpiece was somehow created. Be it a darn good cake or a recipe I never knew I had it in me to prepare. Things just aren't the same in the comfort of my own home. And not in a bad way either. Whenever I get back from work, there's always a warm meal prepared by my darling mother. The only thing I dislike about this arrangement is I don't know how much salt/sugar/oil goes into each meal. Conclusion is, I miss the autonomy that I once had when it comes to preparing my own meals and the only way I am actually going to go back to doing that is if I live by myself and am forced to start being completely responsible for what goes into my mouth. Right now, it just seems too much of an effort and I will somehow have to ease myself back into it.

Despite my current state of contentment, there are a couple of other things that wouldn't really hurt if it were positioned at my advantage just as well. For instance, my physical wellbeing. I actually miss the uphill walks I used to take ever so often back in uni. Not having a car was somewhat the best thing that happened to my calves. Walking from my place to the Foodtown at Britomart and then refusing to take the bus and lugging everything back with my bare hands (and the help of my bf/bffs) was the best decision I had ever made. The walks allowed me to really connect with what I was doing (lugging), with the stretch of my hamstrings and glutes, with the chill that ran up and down my spine during winter and the red imprints that the plastic bags left across my palms from the weight of the groceries. Call me psychotic but I miss all that dearly.

Having a car and driving to and from work is a blessing. But a very mechanical one too. These days I feel like I sit on my bottom way too much and in order to get moving I've actually considered paying a fair amount of money for fitness classes at cut throat gyms. I still have not joined one yet by the way because I'm considering between the yoga classes down the road from my place or the zumba classes at an over crowded gym. Last thing I want is to be locked into a gym I hardly use. I mean seriously, how tough can it be to get moving every now and then, you'd think? Even with a sales job that requires me to be out of the office more than cooped up in one, I'd say that it's a pretty tough feat coz rather than cooped up in an office, I'm sandwiched in my car racing against traffic which involves no movement of my glutes what so ever. So there. I know why people start getting fat when their career seems to take off and I am determined to make it otherwise for me. Stay tuned to find out the status of my success (or failure....).

It also wouldn't really hurt if my man was around a little more often and our only means of communication wasn't hunched in front of a computer and in a haste over skype. I love Akash to bits and pieces but sometimes, I really wish I didn't have to sit in front of the computer again as soon as I came back from work so that I could reconnect with him. I mean even the frequency of that has reduced because when I look at the computer screen again after work, nausea squirms through my body probing me to wriggle away. Lucky for me, the sweetheart that he is will never hold it against me. Aside from that, I'm really proud to claim that we made it an entire year apart. I really admire the patience and constant communication that brought us to where we are although the first couple of months were bumpy. I also admire how in our capacity we always managed to schedule in holidays to be spent with each other