There's always a first
9:16 AM
Turbulent. Right now that's what it is. I feel like talking about it is not an option coz it drives me deeper and deeper into a state of depression. It's better to just disregard the issue and the burden that comes with it.
The good that's come out of it? Carelessness. Well. At least I see it as a good thing for now. You could take a knife and stab it right through my heart and I would feel nothing. I think the confusion acts as an anasthaethic. There is so much of it. Stuff that I cannot fathom. Thoughts that are too scary to think about. Brushed aside... Because the more you get me to talk about it, the more I want to run away.
I don't know how it got to this, neither do I know why. I just know how I feel right now. And for the first time in my life, I feel completely lost. alone. insecure. and this time there is absolutely no one there to tell me that it will pass. no God. no parents. no significant other. no mentor. no friend or foe.
the question that lingers is : why, of all people, did you have to flee? Goes to prove that everyone always does leave. Well, they leave me at least.
The good that's come out of it? Carelessness. Well. At least I see it as a good thing for now. You could take a knife and stab it right through my heart and I would feel nothing. I think the confusion acts as an anasthaethic. There is so much of it. Stuff that I cannot fathom. Thoughts that are too scary to think about. Brushed aside... Because the more you get me to talk about it, the more I want to run away.
I don't know how it got to this, neither do I know why. I just know how I feel right now. And for the first time in my life, I feel completely lost. alone. insecure. and this time there is absolutely no one there to tell me that it will pass. no God. no parents. no significant other. no mentor. no friend or foe.
the question that lingers is : why, of all people, did you have to flee? Goes to prove that everyone always does leave. Well, they leave me at least.
5 comments:
Hey..if there's one thing I know it's this: leaving is waaay harder than being left. Cos the person you leave nvr gets to see your tears.
don't know if it helps but I've been through enough to merit the advice. Hope you feel better. See you in November Miss Greek GOddess.
Shereen
just like you don't know how you got to this and neither do you know why...i know you would get through this state that you are in thought i don't know when or how.
cause you're strong like that.many ppl before you have been left and they survived,so you would too.
*hugs* feel better.
hey girlies!
thanks for the advice. this is my battle but knowing you guys are there to just listen is good enough. Ive been acting so out of character lately. Can't explain it myself. don't spose ne one has the answers either. *sigh*
Love!
answers lie in the pages at the end of the book. they also lie in the item frequently found in the fridge labeled "cookies and cream". finally, u can also ask mr.chong.
but he'd just say u didnt do ur work. yes, he has issue of colour.
nah im kiddin.
dropping by to say hello..
hello dimi :p
hi mike!
thought u didn't think i existed no more. =P kidding. there you go making me laugh again.... ;) sarcastic comments always appreciated and deeply missed. thanks mike-O. you're deeply missed too!
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