Thursday, August 2, 2007

Resurrection of the Past

10:47 PM

" All are architects of fate.... living in these walls of time. So look not mournfully into the past. It comes not back again" -Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

It's my last few days of work!! As much as my enthusiasm to devour the sense of emancipation once again goes, I have to admit that my month long stint in SMC was a very gratifying experience. I went from a twitchy skeptical intern who could not wait to jump outta the office as soon as the clock struck 5 to an eager and rather creative one who didn't mind putting in the extra hours despite the stagnant paycheck.....

Dr Su Lin and Miss Yang agreed to allow me to work from home (weeeeeeeee) beginning thursday and so here I am, keying in data while listening to some conundrum with comfy shorts and a ragged t shirt donned on my in-need-of-a-stretch torso. Despite the multitude of distractions strewn across my path, working from home is more satisfactory than being an office nomad at times....(although I miss talking to the colleagues that I've come to adore). No endless hours of pondering about a suitable ensemble to wear to work or what shade of lipstick would suit the chosen ensemble or if I would be late due to the unpredictable traffic or if outta the blue, someone would suddenly realize that it was time for me to stop wearing open-toe heels. At home, it's just me, my music and the silence that encapsulates the household. Oh, and not forgetting, my personal assistant who helps me with my job outta sympathy - my dearest mummy!

Yep, last night she tediously helped me key in over 300 odd data information without much complain... I did the analysis and she helped with the easier part. And then, i stopped to watch America's Next Top Model while she continued... Yes, I did feel kinda bad for a while and then it vanished. LOL

Anyway, speaking of the past, I think my past will be coming back to haunt me sometime next week... I groan whenever I think of the 9th of August. It jostles around in my memory and turns it to mush before I try and purge out the mere thought and replace it with a picture of angels floating in heaven. I don't even feel like going back to get my results, maybe I'll just ask mom to do it for me and then discard it on the highway while she's driving back. Never having to know beats knowing and feeling disappointed. Sigh!

I finally decided what I want to do with my life, or at least for now.... After months of sourcing and hunting, I realize that the US education system is best suited for people like me (read: indecisive and undecided). I'm hoping to get into the liberal arts and science faculty in a college/uni that will have me. Unfortunately, the realization came along a tad too late, meaning, I might have to take a whole year off so that I can sit for the SATs, start applying and wait for interviews/approval letters... Besides, the next intake that I am legible for is not until September next year... So, yea, I'd probably be an old hag amidst the youngsters in the campus. The competitive nature of US unis is quite worrying but with the time that i have, I assume I will be able to be involved tremendously in many programmes just so I will be considered for some sorta need-blind financial aid. Will be sitting for the SATs sometime in October, the 2 standard papers and 3 subjects tests..... Wondering if TOEFL is absolutely necessary though?? As good backups, I will be applying for other unis as well, the ones in NZ particularly...

Dear darling Shalini will be leaving for Makassar (???!!?) Island to pursue a career in medicine soon. It's true, everyone is leaving and I (not you, Sher!) might be the last one to go... So weird that I won't be seeing her anymore. It was the exact feeling I got when Adam was set to leave. He on the other hand, is all game to jet set off to Somalia on an anthropology research assignment.... sigh! The destinations life takes you to....

Better get back to work now, don't want to get fired one day before my contract ends....

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