Thursday, February 24, 2011

Gravitating.

5:38 AM

I was transported by an armored vehicle with three armored personnel to a shoot location in Damansara today. I thought the entire thing was made too much of a commotion of even though the task at hand was pretty non complex. But I was carrying thousands of dollars worth of precious jewellery. And it was company policy to be escorted with such care if someone was carrying that much worth to a shoot. Anyhoo, as soon I stepped into the shoot, I was greeted by a very chatty crowd which was pretty refreshing to be quite honest. Sometimes when you're an intern, people start treating you like one and I am glad that this was one group that came across as pretty real to me, not some flashy mob on their high and mighty horse. *Makes mental note to seek professional position at The Peak*

The big bosses daughter was the head photographer me thinks. I judge from observation. What struck me the most was how she ruled the room with her loud personality just like her mother did at the office. And yet how different this little minx of a lady was in comparison to her mother. For one, she seemed completely disinterested in everything that LV cherished. And she did not even try to hide it which I thought was really impressive by the way. Tattoos donned on her torso, ciggie in hand and a spunky haircut to boot I could tell that this little missy swore she would never turn into her mother from the very day she was born. I swear she almost tumbled in laughter when I told her that I had arrived in an armored car with three armed security personnel.

Funny how people either really try and emulate their parents. Or try to be someone completely different.

The days are passing by so fast! What the hell. It's almost March for goodness sake. Perhaps it is a good thing because the year of the rabbit is apparently not the best for the rabbit born. But at times I feel like my youth is being snatched away from me. Soon I will be walking around with a tongkat wondering to myself where the hell all that time went.

It's really not that I don't feel like I am achieving much everyday. Just today I learnt what the 'bcc' column in your email allows you to do. Yes. I never knew. Believe it or not. And my lovely boss gave me my very own big break today, which is coincidently small in the life of any other but significant in the life of an intern. I would explain it here but as it is, people don't really get the physics of my job, so explaining a big break that would bring chemistry into the picture will not really settle well. I don't really know what I am talking about so I will stop bickering about this. So back to point one, I think my achievements range from large to miniscule everyday. But I hold on to the believe that you only actually live when you are completely oblivious to the passing of time. Completely unaware if it's fast or slow. And these days, I am constantly aware. Because I am constantly looking forward for different phases of my life to begin.

I don't even know what to do once my internship at Louis Vuitton has timed out. One month to go. Should I decide to work in Auckland? Should I just reside here for a couple more months and accompany my mother? I guess the bigger question is will the opportunities come flowing or would I be overcome by hardship. It's a tough life. And if it were any easier I would have lost interest a long time ago.

Now on to more important matters. I feel like getting a tattoo

One like this (with different detailing/designs) Somewhere on the shoulder. But the only thing that's stopping me is the question of pain.

And I'm also at that weird point in life where I feel like experimenting with a thousand different hairstyles. Not this one though. I still have my brain in the right position.

Aaaannnddd.. I also want to achieve an inner zen. To breathe rhythmically and relax with the sound of waves.

To end. Ohm....

Friday, February 18, 2011

5:57 AM

I don't like this inconsistency. But I have learnt that sometimes inconsistency may be a good thing. Like how some singer comes up with a really popular hit once and then takes a few years to come up with another really popular hit. Celebrities consistently breaking the rules is boring. Another thing that is so yesterday is me consistently trying to come up with reasons why I blog so inconsistently.

Oh well. Consistent or inconsistent. My last few months have been pretty interesting.


This photo brings forth bubbling nostalgic feelings.

I think the only realization that would cause feelings of denial towards growing older is the drifting apart part of life. My friends are now all over the place. And as much as I love the idea of having someone to have tea with when I'm in Paris (yea right!) or a shopping partner in Melbourne (pfffft!) OR a tour guide in Rome (eerrrr...), I also like the idea of having BIG*HUGE*GIGANTIC*GARGANTUAN catch up sessions where everyone is in a jovial mood and completely at ease talking about the things that least matter in life but are seemingly most important at that point in time. Point is, I like having my close friends nearby, and now everyone is distributed like marbles let lose from a bottle, all living their own strange little lives while I have to resort to figuring out my own odd one.


This photo brings forth more nostalgic feelings.

Two years passed without the presence of this petite missy in my life. Somehow, being in Auckland change a little when she left after my first year. Yet seeing her on my 23rd birthday made me realize that people change, but true friends will always share the familiar things that brought them together in the first place. I wish Joanna was in town for longer, coz then I would have felt like we really stretched our time together to make up for those last two years. But her not being here gives me another excuse to earn money for a massive holiday splurge. Perth. Here I come. Someday.

I've learnt to respect anyone who is able to stay in a committed long distance relationship. For me difficult is an understatement when the other is not around physically. But perhaps that only applies to me because I am certainly not the most patient person in the world. Nevertheless, I guess I have learnt to accept that people get into relationships for so many different reasons. And if I am in this one for all the right reasons, just a bit of distance is not going to be a determining factor as to how the future carves itself. Interestingly, I find that this very distance will galvanize us for more challenging times. And yet. Let's be real about it. I miss this boy everyday of my life. And commands that he concedes and decides to stay with me in Malaysia. At least until I decide on the next destination in my life.

I have been travelling. well. not really. but somewhat. Road trip to Malacca is my idea of travelling. It was a good trip. Coz it involved ALOT of walking. Getting lost. And eating. An adventure in itself. And I had the best company ever. Apart from that, I also did make my way up to Gentings when Akash came to town. I'm trying to make it a point to venture into new areas. Maybe have my own weekend adventures. But I will keep you posted. Coz adventures involve money. And money involves a job that does not spell I-N-T-E-R-N-S-H-I-P.

And speaking of internships. Work at LV is the most rewarding experience ever. Because everyday, when i go to work, I feel like I am on the brink of being pushed over an edge. And everyday I come out alive. It's the survival that immerses me in euphoria as soon as the clock strikes 6 (or sometimes 7/7.30). Bottom line my internship gets me out there. And no, I don't get perks or free bags. I just get to work with an awesome team and along side what may be some of the most demanding people I have ever known.

Goodbye world. Sleepy time.

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Lucky. Or not?

5:42 AM

Dear people who still read my blog. Fact is. I have been blogging in absentia. In my head. My head goes furious with thoughts but my fingers sometimes refuses to budge. I think starting work has actually exercised my fingers. Made it wiggle a bit if you will. So every time my thoughts go furious from now on I will blog. For the sake of my love for writing. Which I once claimed to have. I believe I am not fit for the title of a lovely writer any more. I've grown lazy.

On to more recent happenings. If you haven't already heard, I am now interning with Louis Vuitton. Every morning, I am propelled (literally) by a throng of people in some nook of an LRT which transports me right smack in the middle of KL - KLCC. And from there I take a nice long refreshing (zero sarcasm here) walk to Pavilion and from there I cross over to the dainty Starhill building, which feels like a floating heaven compared to the ferocious bustling streets surrounding it.


Ah. This is it. Pretty no?

Adorable glowing dome? Let me stop you there. Before I started interning with LV in the public relations department, I had never set foot into an LV store in my entire life. Neither did I know much about the brand. There was just something about the guards that stood at the entrance and my mediocre financial situation that scared me away from even the thought of exploring what was within. At present, I have still never set foot into an LV store (although that might change soon), but I certainly know SO much more about a brand I have learnt to respect.

It's been two weeks. And in the span of two weeks, I feel like I have endured so much already. My colleagues are incredible. Respectable for their status and yet very humble. Especially my boss who exudes class and appears to be the perfect role model. My fellow intern who is present at the moment to hand over her job to me is a girl with such a positive attitude that upon meeting her I was afraid that what I had to contribute wouldn't have been able to measure up to what she had contributed to the company during her tenure there. The environment seems like the perfect working environment.

With all that said, you would think I am at a pretty awesome position in life right now yes? Thing about me is, I can never be too grateful. I always believe that something petty is about to rain on my parade. Something waiting to jump out at me and go "BOOYAH" which leaves me in a disconnected, discontented position. I hate to admit it but sometimes negativity takes over my mentality. I'm always thinking about the things that could go wrong instead of things that can actually go right or went right.

Fact is. There are a lot of things that went right with work. Some things that went wrong. But I think the best thing yet was my decision to work. Coz, for once, and let me be positive this time, I feel like this job will actually help me grow. Coz as it is, it has made me venture beyond my comfort zone. It made me, somewhat, quit acting like a prima donna and resort to public transport. It's shown me that just by starting somewhere, anywhere, some very spectacular things can be achieved. It's made me pride myself that such great responsibility has been thrust upon my shoulders. It has shown me that sometimes you just need to enjoy your own company rather than that of any other.

Yes. The much harder, greater challenges have yet to come knocking. But just as what the year of the Golden Rabbit has in store for me - a year full of challenges, all I can do now, ready or not, is to be prepared to take a year of challenges, discoveries and revelations by the horns. If anything at all, at least I can be rest assured that by the end of the year I will emerge a stronger person than the one that mirrors me at the moment. This job is perhaps only the first step.

As 2011 begins to unveil itself, I can safely say, that unlike any other year, this year I only have ONE resolution.

patience - to watch and wait and learn.

Til next time....

Sunday, September 19, 2010

Joy

1:41 AM

Joy.

The joy of having good friends.

Naina's 21st in her mansion-like house. Theme: the roaring twenties.


The Joy of dance.

The UMSA crew at the AMS Dinner. Ladies in the sarees and I were involved in the traditional indian dance from Devdas and those clad in black did the Sumazau dance.

The joy of being Indian.

wearing the Gujju style saree. Tied so effortlessly by Kuha and thanks to Shanika for the saree itself.....

If only I had the joy of time as well but I have so much to do!!! Will be relieved as soon as the coming week is over.

My mom wrote the greatest article of all time about God in the newspapers. Simple yet so much truth and I couldn't have agreed more with what she had to say. I guess I'm proud to be my mother's daughter. Another source of JOY. the heaven's are singing on me! Here's the link : mom's the best :)

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

The gift of time

12:42 AM

Ah. Finally. Some blogging time that does not feel too rushed. Submitted my second 3000 word essay yesterday. Feels like a whole burden has lifted off my shoulders. My essay was on obesity from a critical psychology perspective. Where statistics alone didn't matter. All that reading made me stop and look at the other side of the underlying causes of obesity. Ah well. Enough about that. Soon another burden will fall on my shoulders. Yet another 3000 word essay on Alzheimers is due when uni resumes in only a matter of days. As much as I hate writing academic essays, I think this semester somewhat culminated a change. They say practice makes perfect. I'm nowhere near perfect but neither do I squander around cluelessly for sources any longer.

What have I been doing for the break you might ask? Throughout the first week it was a battle between catching up on sleep, recuperating post UMSA ball and disciplining myself to sit down and do the damn essay already! But this week it's been more of a daze. Most of the time I feel my mind drifting away, thinking about a holiday, thinking about a future, thinking about everything apart from uni. And I let it drift. It's perhaps the only time it's appropriate to let your mind drift in the haste of everything.

I think Akash and i have assumed a couple friendship sorta thing with Charles and Chandni. They say couples tend to hang out with couples. I've always thought this wasn't true until I started realizing the comfortable feeling that creeped in ever since we started hanging out with this cute couple:


they is awesome!! such a born "there" but bred "here" couple.

This was at Denny's last weekend where the food was so-so, the service was the crappiest of all time crappiness but the dessert was heavenly!!



warm chocolate fudge over ice cream sandwiched between moist chocolate cake. All four of us shared this delightful concoction.

We went to the casino after coz according to my feng shui, which Akash thinks is total crap and my mother follows religiously, claimed that I had gambling luck this month. Well, perhaps I did, coz we did end up winning ten dollars from Lotto. But I think the entire idea of astrology working at all is on the precondition that you do not become a greedy pig while interpreting it. So there we were gambling the ten dollars that we had won on Russian Roulette, and just as easy as we had won the money, it was lost again. Just like that.


A view from way up above. Gotta say, it felt a bit intimidating sitting next to the affluent (or perhaps not...) and betting a ten dollar note while everyone else possibly had hundreds on the table....

I think I've discovered a new love for dance within me. I am perhaps THE slowest learner of all time. But lately, with Matt's help and with the UMSA Ball and now with this AMS performance thing coming up, I've begun to catch a rhythm I never knew I had. Which is good really. We're performing this Indian dance from Devdas for the Auckland Malaysian Society Night. I think Kuha's really talented, the way she choreographed the dance moves. It's easy to pick up and yet looks complicated enough to pass off as impressive.

It's weird how my body seems to know the right time to have certain cravings for things that are in season. For instance, as of now, I'm having the meanest craving for lotus paste mooncake. I don't think it's the mooncake itself. I think it's also got to do with the nostalgic feeling I get while eating mooncake since I was a little kid. Red bean paste was my favorite then and I recall mumsy cutting the entire thing up into tiny pieces and giving me three each time. I also recall how I used to eat the edges first and then the sweet filling. Ah so nice.

my lotus paste mooncake! I waaaannnnnnt! It's so exxy here in Auckland. Like crazy rip off!


Eleven months. Me. My baby pie. And the world.

And finally. Where do we go from here? There's so much that I've not thought about. A future that I'm scared to be in without you. I know this may sound cheesy to everyone else who's reading this. But I cannot be more honest. Eleven months. And there's been more than a couple of bumps in the road. More ugliness than I would've predicted. Yet, I don't think I would change any part of it. Coz it took me eleven months to realize that throughout it all, I've found a bestfriend, a boyfriend, someone I trust, who puts all the rest to shame, who stands by me during my lowest and sticks by me in all annoyance. I love you heaps Akash Jani. More everyday. For the grandfathe- like front that you sometimes put on and the little kid who's really within you. LOL. Mwahhhhh!

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Breaking free

4:27 AM

Some ball pictures that I sneaked in... others are up on Facebook....

UMSA committee 2010. The lovely people.


with some of the committee members...

with the cool peeps at my table. Such sporting people, none of them were UMSA members, all just came to support me... missing from this snap was Nathan and Wei-Yuen who left earlier.

Akash came as my pilot that day =D


Me and the Fire dance girls. Jie Huei choreographed the dance as our ball opening act....

I spoke the truth to someone I love today. It doesn't matter what the truth is or the consequences. The liberating feeling is all that matters. That you no longer carry the burden of the silly awkwardness that lingers situation after situation, time after time.

I notice with time that I keep discovering all the things that I don't want in life. Why is it then that it's so hard to discover the things that I actually do want? Do I have to slash out all the options on my list until one prominent one prevails?

I feel like I'm in desperate need of close girl friends. I need that sort of an intimacy right now.

I wish I had more inspiration to write yet another 2 3000 worded essays this break. I feel robbed off my break. What's the point when there're irritating thoughts of assignments lurking within the mind?

The ball just passed. And after all those practices and dances and planning, there's an anti climatic feel in the air. The ball went superb, perhaps the most successful one thus far so why this feeling?

I miss something. But I don't know what that is right now. I can't pinpoint. I just know I miss it.

I feel like breaking free. Sitting under a coconut tree in the warm sun and zoning out would be ideal. Getting away.

I feel like I could try harder. But I just couldn't be bothered right now.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

New

12:56 PM

I feel New. For some reason. Weird.

I have an Economics assignment due today. For the first time I feel like it was all my effort and not that of the study group that I am in.

The ball is tomorrow! TOMORROW!! Everything that we've been working towards ends tomorrow. Happy? Sad? What am I supposed to feel for this, potentially, last ball ever? The only ball that I will be attending with an official date. The only ball that I'm obligated to dance/sing/act for all three at once. All the practices that made my calves hurt. The dance moves that I never thought I could pick up, picked up. A ball dress size I never thought I could fit, fitted. A table I never thought I could fill, filled. Akash is hiring a pilot outifit. LOL. Cute!! Tomorrow better be a day worth of all its frustrations.

I can't wait for the break. The ball will be like an opening ceremony to it.

I don't know if I should go back to gyming like how I used to. It's so weird how I've stopped (Well, not totally, i go every now and then), and people are telling me that I'm losing weight. I've always been skeptical about weight loss when it comes to me. But perhaps I have, not too drastically. And this is on top of the fact that Akash feeds me chocolates, heaps. I think it's perhaps coz I'm more tuned to my hunger now. I can actually tell when I'm really hungry and when I'm just craving for something for the fun of it.

I love all these little loopholes. <3. I hate how this is potentially my last semester in uni. I love how it's getting to spring.

ps: my house mate gave me chocolate body paint. =D

signing off